almost giving up

I don't want to sound like a pathetic whiner but I am almost giving up on ever sounding like I know what I am talking about. Sometimes dh doesn't even get what the hell I am trying to say. I have always wanted to be smart and I have always wanted people to think I am smart, witty, and hella funny. Sometimes they do but more often than not I am one big dud. Maybe it's all my imagination. Maybe I am just throwing myself a pity party. Either way I long to be expressive and coherent. I think I have the expressive part down but coherent is another story!

Another thing, the PMS depression is getting worse. I can feel it. It's starting earlier and lasting longer and I really think it is contributing to my almost giving up state. It may be time to ask for help. The idea of that scares the shit out of me. I hate the thought of it. Hell maybe I will just try Tom Cruise's idea of taking vitamins and exercising. I am going to exhaust all other options before I seek therapy. Sheesh, it's creeping me out just saying it.